How to Know If the Shelter Cat Is Choosing You

 

Cats aren’t just passive pets they’re intuitive beings who seek out energy, safety, and connection. Whether they’re visiting your yard or sitting in a shelter cage, cats often choose their people long before the paperwork is signed.

This article explores how to recognize the signs of feline bonding, especially during shelter visits and trial adoptions.

 Cats Know Where They’re Welcome

In my own yard, cats come and go freely. Feral, stray, and neighbor cats drink from my pond, nap in the clover, and lounge on the patio furniture. They don’t visit my neighbor’s yard even though it looks similar because they sense the energy. My neighbor doesn’t like cats. And cats know.

Cats are social animals, but they’re also selective. They gravitate toward places and people who feel safe. That’s true in neighborhoods and it’s true in shelters.

 Shelter Visits: Let the Cat Choose You

If you’re visiting a shelter, don’t rush to pick the prettiest cat or the one with the fanciest breed label. Instead: Sit quietly near the enclosure Let the cat observe you Watch for signs of curiosity or comfort See who approaches you first Cats that choose their people will: Make eye contact Rub against the cage or reach a paw toward you Sit calmly near you instead of hiding Show relaxed body language (tail down, ears forward) These are signs of trust. And trust is the foundation of a lasting bond.

Trial Adoptions: Let the Bond Build Naturally

When I’ve placed rescue kittens, I always tell adopters: “Sit back and let the kitten come to you.” the kitten that approaches, sniffs, and shows affection is the one that’s chosen you.  These unions are strong. None of those kittens were ever returned.

 When Cats Choose to Stay

Over the years, two neighborhood cats decided that their visits would be permanent. Both came from a troubled home. They arrived with bite wounds and trauma—but they found peace in my garden. One day, they curled up beside me on the bench while I read. That was their way of saying, “You’re my person now.”

Eventually, I offered food, water, and shelter. But only after they made the first move.

 Signs a Cat Is Bonding With You

Whether in a shelter, a foster home, or your backyard, look for these signs:

Follows you from room to room

Sleeps near you or on your belongings

Slow blinks and relaxed posture

Head butts, cheek rubs, or gentle paw taps

Comes when called or responds to your voice

These aren’t just behaviors they’re invitations.

🐾 Final Thought: Let the Cat Lead

Adoption isn’t just about choosing a cat. It’s about being chosen.
Let the cat guide the bond. Let the energy speak. And when the moment feels right when the cat curls up beside you or reaches out with a paw you’ll know. You’ve been chosen.

How Trial Cat Adoptions Are Changing Senior Lives

 

 

In my neighborhood, I’ve networked with nearly every senior on the block. Some were curious. Some were hesitant. And some were downright stubborn adamant that a cat wasn’t for them. But I didn’t push. I offered something simple:

“Try this cat for five days. I’ll bring all the supplies. If you want, I’ll clean the litter box for you daily.”  No pressure. No guilt. Just a quiet invitation to companionship. And here’s what happened.

 From “I’m Not Sure” to “I’m Keeping the Cat”

Two out of five seniors said yes. They agreed to the trial, accepted the supplies, and let the cat settle in. By day three, they were talking to the cat. By day four, they were smiling more.
By day five, when I showed up with the carrier, they said: “No. I’m keeping the cat.”

That’s not just a win for adoption. That’s a win for emotional health, mobility, and daily joy.

 Why Trial Adoptions Work for Seniors

No-pressure entry point
Seniors aren’t committing to 15 years they’re committing to five days.

Immediate support
I provide everything: food, litter, toys, and optional litter cleaning.

Emotional shift
The presence of a cat softens loneliness, sparks routine, and invites gentle interaction.

Empowerment
Many seniors who initially asked for help end up saying, “I’ll clean the litter myself.”

 What Kind of Cats Work Best

Adult cats aged 5+ – Calm, socialized, and less demanding

Short-haired breeds or mixes – Easier grooming for seniors with arthritis

Rescue cats from bulletin boards – Especially those whose previous owners were elderly. These cats are already used to quiet homes, gentle voices, and steady routines. They’re not just adoptable they’re ideal.

 

 How You Can Start a Trial Program

If you’re a shelter, advocate, or community volunteer, consider offering:

A 5-day trial with full supplies

Optional litter cleaning or check-ins

A follow-up visits with no pressure to return the cat

You’ll be surprised how many seniors say yes and how many say “I’m keeping the cat.”

 Disclaimer

This article reflects personal experience, community outreach, and independent advocacy. It is not intended as veterinary advice or a substitute for professional consultation. All recommendations are based on ethical adoption practices and practical care considerations for senior citizens. Please consult with local shelters, veterinarians, or elder care professionals before making adoption decisions.

Lucy’s Storm: What a Feral Cat Taught Me About Rescue, Nursing, and Letting Go

 

In the summer of 2008, four years after we moved to Missouri, a feral cat made a decision that changed everything.

We didn’t know her name yet. We didn’t know her story. But we watched her soaked, trembling, and determined carry her newborn kittens one by one into our garage during a thunderstorm that shook the whole neighborhood. She chose our shed as sanctuary. And we chose to honor that trust.

We named her Lucy.

A Mother’s Instinct

Lucy had no collar, no chip, no known history. But she had instinct. She nursed her kittens for nine full weeks longer than most ferals allow. Even as we offered canned kitten food, she kept nursing. She knew they needed more. She knew they weren’t thriving.

We kept the shed warm, quiet, and stocked with food. Lucy did the rest. Her babies suckled and slept, curled into her belly, while the storm passed and the weeks rolled on.

When the kittens were finally weaned, we trapped them gently, socialized them with care, and found them new homes. Later, we learned both had underlying health issues. Lucy had known. She’d stayed longer. She’d held on.

Lucy in the woods by our home 2009

 Lucy’s Legacy

After her kittens were placed, we trapped Lucy, had her spayed, and released her back into the woods she knew. She couldn’t be socialized, but she could be protected. And so we did through blizzards, hawk attacks, and bitter cold.

Lucy lived for 17 years, defying every statistic about feral cat survival. She was cautious, camouflaged, and fiercely intelligent. She survived predators, storms, and illness. She sunbathed on our patio chairs, made friends with a gray cat who groomed her, and on her final winter night walked through our open door and sat quietly on the kitchen floor.

We gave her end-of-life care, warmth, and companionship. She passed peacefully in January 2025, surrounded by love and buried on the land where she was born.

You can read her full tribute on Cat Adoption Guide.

If you’ve ever watched a feral cat carry her babies through thunder, or wondered whether you’re doing enough know this: warmth, food, and presence matter. Lucy knew. And now, so do we.

Feeding a 3-Week-Old Kitten: What Every Rescue Should Know

 

 

In 2015, my husband and I found a trash bag on the side of the road. Inside were baby kittens cold, fragile, and fighting for life. We didn’t know their age, but we knew instinctively what had to happen: keep them warm, bottle feed them, and stay close. That moment changed everything. What we learned through trial, error, and late-night research became the foundation for this guide. If you’ve just found a kitten and feel overwhelmed, I hope this article helps you the way others helped us.

At three weeks old, a kitten is entering a critical developmental stage. Their blue eyes are still prominent, ears begin to point upright, and baby teeth start to emerge. Vision and hearing are improving, and they’ll begin walking, exploring, and even testing out the litter box. A healthy kitten at this age typically weighs between 350–450 grams (12.8–14.1 ounces).

 Introducing Food

You can begin weaning by offering a mix of wet kitten food and kitten formula. This can be served in a shallow dish or fed via kitten-specific bottles. A general guideline is 4 ounces of milk per pound of body weight per day. For example, a 3-pound kitten would need approximately 12 ounces of formula daily, divided into multiple feedings.

 Essential Care Tips for 3-Week-Old Orphaned Kittens

 Feeding Schedule Feed every 6–8 hours, dividing total intake across feedings. Offer milk replacement formula in a shallow dish to encourage weaning. Introduce a moist, chewable mix of warm formula and high-quality kitten food 4–6 times daily. Avoid cow’s milk, which can cause digestive upset.

 Hydration: Provide fresh, clean water at every feeding. Rinse and refill the water bowl regularly, and sanitize weekly.

 Warmth: Use a low-setting heating pad wrapped in a towel until kittens are 4–6 weeks old. Ensure the bedding is warm but not hot, mimicking the warmth of a mother cat.

Cleanliness: Use clean newspaper for bedding during the first week. Avoid soft cloth bedding, which can pose suffocation risks for newborns.

Weight Monitoring: Kittens should gain about ½ ounce (14 grams) daily or 4 ounces (113 grams) weekly. Weigh kittens every 12 hours for the first two weeks, then daily until weaned. Continue weekly weigh-ins until at least 8 weeks of age.

 

📚 Supporting Resources

• Feeding Orphaned Kittens – VCA Animal Hospitals
• Best Friends Animal Society – Feeding and Weaning Orphaned Kittens
• Caring for Orphaned Kittens Under 3 Weeks – WikiHow

 

If you’ve just opened a trash bag and found life inside, or if you’re staring at a tiny kitten wondering what to do next know that you’re not alone. We’ve been there. And every ounce of care you give matters.

Bringing Home a Rescue Cat: Day One Rituals for Safety and Trust

 

Welcoming a rescue cat home? Learn how to create a safe, calming space on day one from setting up the perfect cat room to building trust through quiet companionship.

Over the years, I’ve welcomed many rescued cats into my home. And while each one arrives with their own story, my first-night routine has never changed. It’s a ritual of safety, calm, and quiet trust.

Setting Up the Safe Room

Every new arrival gets their own sanctuary a cat-safe room prepared with care: A clean litter box, fresh food, and water bowls. A pet crate lined with a self-warming bed, covered with a blanket to create a cozy den. A Feliway diffuser plugged into the wall to ease anxiety and promote calm. A sturdy cat tree securely mounted to the wall for safe climbing. Soft classical music playing in the background it seems to soothe them, and it soothes me too.

The floors are laminated wood, easy to clean and disinfect. I always wipe them down with vinegar before a new cat enters. This room becomes their haven, a place to absorb the scent of the house and the quiet presence of other pets without direct interaction.

What If You Don’t Have a Spare Room?

Not every household has a dedicated cat-safe room. If you're juggling kids, other pets, or limited space, you can still offer your rescue cat a soft landing without compromising their emotional safety.

Here’s how I’ve adapted when space was tight: I’ve used a large dog kennel with a secure latch and covered sides. Inside, I place a pet bed toward the front and tuck food and water bowls behind it, out of the way. For litter, I use a shallow shoe box lid it fits perfectly and keeps things tidy. I always spray the interior with Feliway Mood Modifier before the cat enters, never while they’re inside. The scent helps ease anxiety, but spraying near a frightened cat can backfire. I’ve carved out calm zones in guest bathrooms, laundry rooms, and even behind furniture using folding screens or baby gates. I’ve taught kids that this is a sacred time—no loud voices, no reaching in. Just quiet presence. I’ve kept resident pets out of the cat’s zone for the first few days, swapping blankets and toys to introduce scent before any face-to-face meeting.

Playpens don’t work for adult rescues. They climb. They leap. They panic. Containment must be secure, not just suggested. The principle remains the same: containment, calm, and quiet companionship. Even without a spare room, you can offer your rescue cat the gift of safety and trust. It’s not about perfection it’s about intention.

First Impressions Matter

On day one, I don’t expect affection. I don’t reach or coax. I simply sit on the floor and read a book. My presence says: I’m here. I’m safe. I won’t hurt you.

Most cats hide. Some hiss. A few try to scale the walls or test the windows. That’s why I always keep windows shut and locked. Fear makes them resourceful, and safety must come first.

The Hardest Day Is the First

The first day is often the hardest for both of us. But it gets better. With time, patience, and quiet companionship, the Feliway begins to work its magic. The cat starts to relax. They begin to explore. And eventually, they’ll want to learn more about me.

This isn’t just a rescue it’s the beginning of a relationship. One built on trust, respect, and the quiet promise that they’re finally home.

Will My Cat Leave Me for Someone Else?

 

Recently, I received a message from one of my Cat Adoption Guide followers. They were heartbroken and confused:

“My cat goes outside and disappears for three days sometimes a whole week before coming home. Could she be leaving me for someone else?”

It’s a question many cat parents ask, especially when their once-devoted feline starts vanishing for long stretches. The answer isn’t simple, but it’s rooted in instinct, environment, and emotional safety.

 

Why Unsterilized Cats Wander

If your cat hasn’t been spayed or neutered, wandering is almost guaranteed. Male cats (tomcats) will patrol their territory, seeking mates and defending their turf from rival males. Female cats will roam in search of a suitable mate, often traveling several blocks or even into wooded areas to find one.  This behavior isn’t abandonment. It’s biology. But it can lead to heartbreak, injuries, disease (FIV or FeLV) and unwanted litters if left unchecked.

 What If My Cat Is Sterilized?

If your cat has been fixed and still disappears for days, it’s time to look inward. Cats are deeply sensitive to change. Even small disruptions like a new pet, a visiting relative, or a shift in household routine can trigger stress. When cats feel anxious or displaced, they may seek comfort elsewhere. A quieter yard. A neighbor who feeds them. A space that feels safer or more familiar.

 A Story from My Own Backyard

Several years ago, a black cat began visiting my backyard feeding station. He never left. After six months, his original owners finally appeared. They explained that they’d adopted a young queen cat with kittens, and their senior male now 15 had been pushed outdoors because she didn’t tolerate him.

He wandered just four blocks away and chose my yard as his new home. He wasn’t lost. He was displaced and he made a choice.

 Do Cats Leave Their People?

Yes, sometimes they do. But it’s not about betrayal. It’s about survival, comfort, and emotional safety.  Cats don’t stay where they’re merely tolerated. They stay where they feel loved, secure, and seen.

So, if your cat is wandering, ask yourself:

• Has something changed at home?
• Is your cat feeling stressed or excluded?
• Could another yard feel more peaceful or welcoming?

Cats choose the people they want to love. And sometimes, they choose again.

Indoor Cats need Flea/Tick Prevention

 

Normally I treat my indoor / outdoor cats with Revolution.  This topical treatment provides protection against a range of parasites, including fleas, ear mites, worms and some types of ticks. However, my three senior cats do not go outside, the only time they get fresh air is by sitting on  our screened in sun porch.   When I found a tick on the indoor cats I knew that all cats needed protection against fleas and ticks.

(AI generated image created by Susang6) 

Cats with access to an outdoor cattery or screened in porch can still be exposed to fleas and ticks. Fleas can hitch a ride on clothing, shoes, or other pets, while ticks may find their way into the cattery or porch through small gaps in the screen or from other animals like our dog or our indoor / outdoor cats. While the risk is lower compared to cats roaming freely outdoors, it's not zero. 

My indoor senior cats get tropical Revolution treatment

Fleas and ticks can cause irritation, allergic reactions, and even transmit diseases.

If you are interested in learning more about flea and tick prevention treatments.  Here are the ones that I recommend. 

Revolution for cats is a topical treatment that provides protection against a range of parasites, including fleas, ear mites, and some types of ticks. For comprehensive tick prevention, you might want to consider products like Revolution Plus, Bravecto Topical, or Advantage Multi, as these are often recommended for tick control.

My veternarian recommends year-round flea and tick prevention for all cats, including those primarily indoors.  It's best to consult your veternarian to determine the most suitable treatment for your cat.

How to Get a Sick Cat to Eat

 

This past week one of my rescue cats became ill and refused to eat and drink.  His symptoms were a warning sign that something was wrong and made an appointment at the Veterinarian.    While I waited for that appointment, I needed to take steps to get the sick cat to eat.

Cats rely heavily on their sense of smell to stimulate their appetite, so when they have a fever and congestion, eating can become a challenge.

Here are some ways that I encouraged the sick cat to eat.

• Warm up the food: Heating wet cat food slightly can enhance its aroma, making it more appealing.
• Offer strong-smelling foods: Foods like tuna, chicken broth, or baby food (without onions or garlic) can be more enticing.
• Hand-feed or syringe-feed: If your cat refuses to eat, gently offering food on your finger or using a syringe with canned pate food that is mixed with water.
• Try different textures: Some cats prefer pâté-style wet food, while others might like shredded or gravy-based options.
• Reduce stress: A quiet, comfortable feeding environment can make a difference.
• Consult a vet: If your cat continues to refuse food, a vet may recommend appetite stimulants or other treatments.

Cats can develop serious health issues if they go too long without eating, keeping an eye on their condition is crucial.   In my case the rescued cat had a fever and congestion.  The veterinarian prescribed Miratax a topical application for cats only to stimulate appetite, antibiotics for fever and infection.

About Outdoor Cats and H5N1 Avian Influenza (bird flu)

 

We are devoted cat lovers and take pride in caring for a feral cat colony while sharing our garden with our own cats. Seven days ago, one of our personal cats, was happily playing in the garden with me. Just a few days later, he became seriously ill, suffering from a dangerously high fever, refusing food and water. Our cat is fully vaccinated and receives monthly parasite treatments, with no contact with other cats. This sudden illness is worrisome—what could have caused our cat to become so sick?   

As cat lovers, we want our feline friends to enjoy a happy and healthy life, whether they're lounging indoors or exploring the great outdoors. However, recent health concerns highlight the importance of extra caution for outdoor cats, as a new wave of illnesses, including the highly contagious H5N1 avian influenza (bird flu), is impacting domestic felines.

How Cats Are Exposed to Viruses Outdoors

While cats are naturally curious and enjoy roaming the garden or yard, even limited outdoor exposure can carry risks. Viruses like bird flu can spread through several ways:

• Contact with Contaminated Environments: Cats can encounter feathers, bird droppings, or other materials that may carry the virus.
• Airborne Particles: Respiratory droplets from infected birds or other animals can linger in the air, posing a potential risk.
• Indirect Transmission: Walking on or sniffing contaminated surfaces, like soil or outdoor cathouse where an infected cat or other animal could have contaminated with with droppings.

Symptoms to Watch For

If your cat has been outdoors recently, keep an eye out for these symptoms, which could indicate illness:

• High fever
• Lethargy and weakness
• Loss of appetite
• Difficulty breathing

Early detection is critical, so if your cat shows any of these signs, consult your veterinarian immediately.

Tips to Keep Your Cat Safe

To protect your outdoor-loving feline during virus outbreaks, consider these precautions:

1. Limit Outdoor Time: Avoid letting your cat roam freely and supervise their outdoor activities, especially during known outbreaks. You may want to install an outdoor cattery or teach your cat to walk on a leash.  
2. Monitor the Environment: Be aware of any local wildlife, particularly birds, that could pose a risk.  
3. Hygiene Matters: Regularly clean outdoor areas where your cat might walk or rest.
4. Boost Their Immunity: Ensure your cat is eating a nutritious diet, staying hydrated, and getting plenty of rest.

A Word of Encouragement

While the risks of outdoor exposure can feel daunting, the love and care you provide make a world of difference. By taking these preventive steps, you can help your cat continue to enjoy fresh air safely while reducing the chances of illness.